RIP, Aunt Maisie

She’s dead.

After the saga I detailed on Twitter, but not here, which led to some not so nice words being said, and after her admission to hospital on Saturday, she’s dead.

Maisie was a manipulative woman. I made that clear here, many times. But I often neglected to mention that she had good points.

I was going to go and see her tomorrow, but now she’s dead. I won’t forgive myself for not going when I could have.

Jesus.

I’m in shock. What now?

The immediate “what now” is that I have to go to my mother’s, who seems distraught.

More in the next few days.

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10 thoughts on “RIP, Aunt Maisie

  1. Pan, I want to make sure that I understand the dynamic of your relationship with Maisie. Do you have a link to any posts about her? I don’t want to comment with knowing the background…

      • Yikes, I wondered if that’s who she was. Sweetie please be careful. I’ve thought of this situation for myself with my own uncle and his wife. This may be full of triggery situations for you. Please, please, take care of yourself above all else. Your mother may need you but she doesn’t know the complexity of this situation.

        And do NOT blame yourself for not visiting her! I know my view of this is tangled up with my own situation but I can’t help feeling that you didn’t have a responsibility to her.

        I’ll go read up some more…

  2. Sorry to hear about your aunt, even if your relationship had been difficult, it is not easy to lose a family member. Don’t feel guilty that you did not make it to see her. You were not to know that it would be so quick. Remember to look after yourself when you’re supporting your mother. Good luck over the next few days. xx

  3. Like people have said above, don’t blame yourself for not visiting, given everything that’s happened it’s more than understandable. Please take care of yourself.

  4. Thanks everyone.

    The situation is compounded by several factors:

    1. Paedo;
    2. The fact that Sarah (Maisie’s daughter), ScumFan (Sarah’s son) and I were bitching about her last week;
    3. Fucking bitch of Satan, Aunt of Evil, will be coming home from America for the funeral. This is the worst of the fucking lot. How will I fucking cope with her?!

    Anyway, issues to worry about later. I’ll keep you updated.

    Thanks again lovelies. Take care ❤ xxx

    • This is certainly difficult and complicated.

      People bitch about each other. It’s normal. It’s part of life. Families are complicated. Of course, it’s also normal you feel guilty. Juts try to be gentle with yourself.

  5. Oh Pan, its complicated isn’t it? Take care of yourself. I know this will bring up a lot of stuff for you but you are strong. ❤ xxx

  6. Pan
    am sorry about your aunt!, as she was someone in your life though a complicated relationship she was part of your extended family and in your family you were close. And sorry to your mom. IT must be so loaded for you.

    I found when people I was somewhat close to died that I had a complicated relationship with, especially one in some ways tied to prior abuse that was traumatic, I experienced a mix of feelings…guilt, grief etc…some of which I judged myself for before learning it was normal. I advise against judging self…it makes things worse.

    I hope you don’t mind me sharing a situation that happened in my life of someone dying in a similar way…ie with me not visitng in hospital i in time–happened with my dear Dad, who I loved. I thought I had time…I didn’t know he was dying or certainly not that day…I didn’t have all the information it turned out. I didn’t get there in time to say goodbye or be there for him…or even, help prevent what had happened.

    Please don’t be so hard on yourself if you can help it. You too lacked all the data in making the decision in the moment not to go, is my guess. You did not know she was going to definetely die. If you had all the data….were a reader of the future…you likely would have gone.

    That is how I finally forgave myself…with the help of friends telling me this over and over. I did not know all of what was going on. I would forgive a friend of such a mistake. Someone reminded me that it was unhelpful to treat myself more unforgivingly of an honest mistake than I would other people. To be my own friend. Graduallly, I did.
    hope you do too. Hope you listen to your loving friends, also above, in taking care of self first not just MOM who does not know how loaded this may be for you.
    Peace to you at this difficult time. I hope you can stay away from Aunt of Evil as much as possible.
    L

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