I know I’ve already written a proper review of 2010, but I’ve never been a person capable of ignoring these type of questionnaires. They used to permeate email, but now that so many of us are bloggers, it makes sense to have them in that kind of arena instead. So, courtesy of the lovely UselessCPN off whom I stole the following, I present to you 2010 in 40 Questions (feel free to do your own post, I’m sure UCPN won’t mind), complete with (my personal creation of) The Biggest Cunt of the Year Award.
1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
I spent a full second year as an unemployed adult. Since the age of 16, when I started working, the shortest period of unemployment/illness before this one was of about nine months’ duration.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn’t, and haven’t, make/made any. What’s the point?
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
-ish. My cousin (well, technically my cousin-once-removed), Suzanne, gave birth to a (second) boy in March, calling him after her grandfather – namely my uncle, namely Paedo. Yay.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
5. What countries did you visit?
6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
Contentment. Money. Adequate NHS(-funded) therapy.
7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
21 August, because of the awesome craic of the Mad Up.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Keeping out of the bin, probably.
9. What was your biggest failure?
The fact that I am still a pathetic, useless fucking dolescum. Doubleplusungood.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Well, since this entire blog is about various illnesses, perhaps you can make deductions from that. A few self-inflicted injuries were noted – perhaps particularly this one – and I had the usual perennial troubles with my knee and IBS.
11. What was the best thing someone bought you?
The Amazon Kindle that A bought me for my birthday.
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
That of A, my friends, sometimes my mother and of course the other Madosphere mentals.
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and/or depressed?
Whose didn’t, save for the answers to 12?
14. Where did most of your money go?
I really have no fucking clue, but it went somewhere, because I have none at all.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I know that this is really, really pathetic, but probably some of my blog awards. This journal is the only successful-ish thing I’ve personally achieved in a very long time, and occasionally I allow myself just a little pride in it. /narcissism
16. What songs will always remind of 2010?
Probably ones I don’t like. I have an OCD-esque issue wherein I cannot change the radio station in the car under almost any circumstances, as I start to hyperventilate and panic. The station in question is better than any other local ones, but still shit, so my attachment to it is perplexing in the extreme. In any case, it means that I know lots of songs that I loathe, because I have to listen to the hateful things in their entirety, unless it’s time to disembark from the driver’s seat.
My only hope in this regard is that the faff that permeated music in 2010 will be forgotten in a few weeks. I mean, we didn’t have any Queens or The Beatles this year, did we? No one to inspire, and no one to stand out. Just your usual modern-day, generic, uninteresting, unlike-able bilge.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Probably very slightly happier. I’m not intending to kill myself this month, for example. As noted so frequently on this blog, despite the NHS shoving a huge ‘fuck you’ up my arse, at least Paul is A Good Thing. And Seroquel is my equivalent of crack. The stuff is little short of miraculous.
b) fatter or skinnier?
A little skinnier, but it’s all relative. I’m still a fat bastard, just slightly less of one.
c) richer or poorer?
Distinctly the latter. Not that I wasn’t struggling like fuck last year either, mind you.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Reading. I still can’t concentrate properly on it, a state of affairs that I despise. Still, the Kindle is giving me some hope in this regard.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Nothing really. I suppose I should say, “I wish I’d eaten/smoked/drank less” or something, but fuck it. We all have our vices, and besides which I’ve re abandoned the ‘smoking’ bit again as of yesterday. Hopefully…
20. How do you plan to spend Christmas?
On a desert fucking island away from human beings. 2009‘s was unbearable and though Christmas Day of 2010 was fine, Boxing Day proved that nothing ever runs smoothly at this most detestable time of year.
21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
Not newly. I’ve been happily coupled up since 2003 How very BPD of me…
22. How many one night stands?
None. Actually, I’ve never had any one-night stands, and only two consensual sexual relationships in total. I’m such a promiscuous BPD whore, aren’t I? Evil!!!
23. What was your favourite TV programme?
24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Mr Director-Person. In January 2010, I was vaguely hopeful that he wouldn’t be a twat and would, indeed, maybe be willing to help me – but instead he turned out to be *drum roll* The Biggest Cunt of the Year, 2010 (well, arguably The Second Biggest Cunt of 2010, but let’s leave it at that ).
I hereby present Mr Director-Person with this truly well-deserved piece of recognition for such an achievement. When so many people are cunts in my world, being the biggest – or even second biggest – is truly a massive accomplishment. Congratulations, sir!
25. What was the best book you read?
Reading has been difficult owing to my poor concentration. Thanks, mentalism. I have quite enjoyed Judith Herman’s Trauma and Recovery, Martha Stout’s The Myth of Sanity and Marc Feldman’s Playing Sick? Untangling the Web of Munchausen Syndrome, Munchausen by Proxy, Malingering, and Factitious Disorder. Can you spot a theme here?!
In fiction terms, I didn’t read anything to completion, but did buy Darkly Dreaming Dexter by Jeff Lindsay, and am intending to start it soon. I’ve never seen the TV series which based itself on the Dexter books, but I know the basic premise thereof and think the whole thing sounds like it would be right up my street.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Sirenia. I love them. Actually, I’ve come across a lot of gothic/symphonic metal bands this year – mainly thanks to Last.FM - but Sirenia are, in my mind, the most consistently excellent. They have some evocative, if admittedly occasionally contrived, lyrics as well.
27. What did you want and get?
See 11 – it was the Amazon Kindle.
28. What did you want and not get?
A lottery win. Adequate fucking therapy from the NHfuckingS.
29. What was your favourite film of this year?
I watch very, very, very few, so it was probably Inception – but I’d only give it three or three-and-a-half out of five. Not bad, but grossly over-rated. It was certainly no The Matrix, despite what it may have tried to claim.
30. What did you do on your birthday?
Aside from trying to pretend it wasn’t happening, I ate an Indian meal, and drank some red wine and mulled cider
31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
The slow, lingering torture of Mr Director-Person. *fantasises*
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Oh for God’s sake. I just wear stuff that fits! I really don’t give a fuck about a ”personal fashion concept”, other than to dye my hair with more frequency than I really should.
33. What kept you sane?
Nothing, but Seroquel and Paul kept me saner. I’d be dead without the former, and in a sort of therapeutic purgatory of evil without the latter. Also, of course, A
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None really. Most of them look the same to me, and I like individuality, eccentricity and nerdishness. Matt Smith is pretty quirky looking as the Doctor, but is much more dull to behold in real life, no offence to him. Ditto Benedict Cumberbatch who was a stunningly and shockingly alluring Sherlock (see above), but who doesn’t look at all the same in real life
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Benefit cuts. The next few years could well see very many of us completely and utterly fucked, despite being genuinely incapable of work. Oh, you’ll look after the most vulnerable, will you? Yeah fucking right, cuntfucks. There is cunt all evidence to suggest that current policy-makers even believe in mental illness.
For once, I’m almost grateful now that I can’t vote for the same parties as the rest of the United Kingdom because as a Lib Dem supporter, I’d probably have felt betrayed. On the other hand, I suppose, they can only make a meaningful contribution from on the inside – but when will they actually start doing it?!
36. Who do you miss?
My best mate, Daniel – he lives in London. Also the others on the mainland, namely CVM, K, Annie and all the wonderful Mad Up mentals.
37. Who was the best new person you met?
It’s a plural for this one: the people from the Madosphere that I met at the Mad Up.
38. What was the best thing you ate?
Almost certainly something Indian with a triple-dose of garlic infused amongst its delightful sauce. That said, I had some bloody good kebabs in Turkey too, particularly at this remote but amazing restaurant.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010?
The same one I re-learn every year: expect the worst, hope for the best, and take what comes. As long as what comes isn’t something that unfairly fucks you right over, in which case take the cunt(s) responsible on with a vengeance and fuck them over back.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
I still cling on to the will to be [rather tenuously at times, of course, but I do still respire, so...] / Though overthrown by life’s insanity / Collapsing in anxiety / Will the demons ever set me free
Why not see what I’m actually on about:
Be well and safe, me auld muckers.
Others That Have Taken Part in this Meme
If you have participated and are not included here, feel free to let me know.